For most people, a couple relationship is the place where their feelings are more involved. Intensive communication about feelings is also part of the couple relationship. An unhappy relationship is associated with dissatisfaction, anger, and doubt.

Mixed couples may find that some of their conflicts are part of their different cultural perspectives. Conflicts are experienced as unresolved issues. Usually one partner expects the other to change his/her behavior and/or attitude. Only then will the other be willing to change.

In most cases, couples are trapped in a “container of feelings”*. They keep their feelings and opinions to themselves until they “explode” and let it all out. As a result, the solution they first thought could solve their problems becomes the problem.

Paradoxically, this is the best motivation to begin therapy. When couples are ready to say, “Help us get out of here,” they have already taken the first step toward solving their problems.

* According to von Schlippe and Schweitzer